Ta-da… It’s today’s DuhNooz headlines:
Takes Two Clergy T’Marry Chelsea Clinton an Marc Whutsisname. Duhh. If at knot’s at hard t’tie, maybe ‘ey shoulda brung in some Boy Scouts. Oh, y’say it wuz a protestant minister an a rabbi? Mus’ be a joke in air somewhair, don’tchy thank?
State-Owned Groups Fuel China’s Real Estate Boom. Duhh. At’s a headline? Ain’t China still a bunch a’communists, an ain’tat whut commies do? I mean control the economy?
National Guard Border Deployment Will Take Weeks. Huh? Didn’ the Obama gang say the guard wuz gonna start guardin’ a/o the first uv August?. Oh. Now they say it’s gonna take time fer serious trainin t’jist stand air with no weapons an watch the illegals go by an not do nuthin about it? Duhh!
67% of Americans Drink; Experts Say Economy Could Be at Fault. Er-uhh. Only 67% admit it? And jist who are them experts? Could’ey be the same economists who’ve been goofin’ up s’much on prognostications about the economy?
College officials suggest that many students simply do not grasp that using words they did not write is a serious academic misdeed. Er-uhh… So now we got a new excuse fer cheatin on college papers? Ignorance? An the perfessors are makin’ the excuse up? Well brang on Harvard. Ebm I could git a MBA at way. Duhh!
Gov. Tim Pawlenty of Minnesota Campaigns in Iowa. Huh? An at’s fer president? An at’s fer the 2012 election? Oh dang, how quick we fergit. At’s jist two years frum now. An at means air ain’t hardly no time left t’fight.
Wikileaks Renegade Site Now Working With the News Media. Oh, so at’s all it takes t’make givin’ away military secrets OK. Jist share’em with the NY Times, etc., so them boys at call they selves journalists git t’do part a’the dirty work. Well, I guess. If the Times says so it must be OK. Specially since ‘ey git t’do the leakin.’ Duhh!
It’s like at ole boy Desiderius Erasmus said way back yonder: “Fortune favours the fool.” —In Praise of Folly (1515)
