Headline: Fired USDA official receives apologies from White House, Vilsack (WP)
Ain’t it fun t’watch people eat crow? Specially them puffed up fokes in the gummint whut spends s’much time with CYA? An the puffed ups at talk about’em on whut passes fer news on TV? One day everbody jist falls in line an’ joins in with some blogger who’s railroadin’ at nice lady, Shirley Sherrod frum the agriculture department. Next day, crow gobblin’ time. Duhh.

Quote frum NYT: “The Library of Congress recently announced that it will be acquiring — and permanently storing — the entire archive of public Twitter posts since 2006.” Now ain’t we all jist s’proud uf our liberry uf congress? An don’t we all look forward t’our children an our children’s children bein’ able t’go t’the liberry an read all at Twitterin? An’ don’t we all jist enjoy hearin about our tax money bein’ spen so wisely? Could we git a double Duhh? DUHH-H-H!

Headline: Facebook Tops 500 Million Users
Now wait jist a minute. Didn some pollin’ outfit jist say Facebook wuz voted most hated? An wouldn’ at mean 500 million fokes love t’love whut thay hate? An’ could all ‘em fokes spendin’ s’much time doodlin’ on Facebook have sumpm’ t’do with s’many people bein’ outta work? Duhh.

Three of every four oil and gas lobbyists worked for federal government (WP) Whut!? Fokes at use’ta work for the gummint are now pullin down big salaries workin’ fer big oil, gittin’ gummint favors fer’em? Well, I never! Who would’a thunk it? Ye don’t spose thairs any former gummint fokes lobbyin’ fer big pharma or big ag (them big cumpnies at passes fer farmers) do ye? Does at mean the smartest people git outta gummint? An if so, whut kind uv gummint workers would be left t’dream up more paperwork fer us t’fill out? Duhh!

We jist hafta git back t’that ole boy Thomas Paine on this’un. ‘Member he said back air in 1792, when fathers wuz first bein promoted t’forefathers, “Government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil” –The Rights of Man (1792)

People hate Facebook. At crazy thang. 400 million people are signed up fer it, but hate it? At’s whut a survey says. Here’s all ‘ese fokes who put all ‘ey’re secrets on Facebook, trustin’ Facebook t’keep at least a secret or two, an the Internet giant blabs all. Duhh. Ain’t there sumpm wrong thair somewhair? Is it the fokes or Facebook or the survey people at’s gluttons fer punishment?

The Obama gang fires first an’ thinks later. At lady whut got caught sayin sumpm at seemed racist about helpin’ or not helpin’ a farmer because she’s black an he’s white? Turns out whut the lady, Shirley Sherrod, said wuz jist the opposite. Now the gimmint’s gon have a investigation? But she gits her job back? Anybody confused?

An the NAACP says ‘ey got snookered inta sayin’ some bad thangs about the lady too. An all iss got started by some blogger jist tryin’ t’stir up trubble. Well now. At clears it all up. How could sumpm on the Internet be wrong? Good gracious, fokes! Ain’t everthang y’read on the Internet spose t’be true? An don’t the gummint spose t’make important decisions based on at truth? Duhh. Anybody wanna count how many gluttons fer punishment we got here?

An how ’bout them Republicans? ‘Ey’re so smart. Pick a fight over gummint spendin’ and how do they do it? Why, hold up jobless benefits with a big filibuster. Now at shore makes’em popular. Talk about pickin’ the right battles! At oughtta jist shoo’em in when we have elections in November. Dubble Duhhhhh. Dubble gluttons fer punishment.

The Obama gang agin: DaddyO’s gonna tell Prime Minister David Cameron whut fer in at case uv the British lettin’ the Lockerby bomber go. Least at’s whut some a’the press said. Ebm said BP had sumpm t’do with it. So whut did the Pres & the Prime talk about? Why the real important stuff. Cold beer versus warm beer, whether their children kept their bedrooms cleaned up and the England-United States World Cup soccer match that ended in a tie. Shore sounded like a real whut fer t’me. Duhh. Is the press all gluttons fer it, er jist some of’em?

Cue Siggy. Like at ole boy Siggy said when he invented the slip, “…we men… find reality generally quite unsatisfactory” – Sigmund Freud, Psychoanalysis (1910)